Papa Bear Instinct

You know, it's funny being pretty much a stay-at-home dad. I love being able to take care of Evan. I love the bond that has developed between him and I. I love being able to show him new things and teach him about the world. I'm especially excited about this coming summer...since he'll be a bit more sturdy to travel and should be ready to venture out of the house and we can explore.

I've got a job that allows me to arrange my schedule and lets me have this time with Evan. Linda, on the other hand, works in the corporate world and has the usual 8a-5p Monday through Friday job. It only made sense for me to stay at home with Evan once Linda went back to work after maternity leave. It's funny though...lots of my friends and coworkers shower me with praise for being a stay-at-home dad. I'm not doing anything spectacular...if the shoe was on the other foot, would they shower Linda with the praise I get? I know it's still a rarity for the dad to be the primary caregiver, but this trend is growing...

Recently I discovered an area stay-at-home dads group that gets together twice a week for play dates, and every month, they have a "dads night out" which is where we leave the kids at home with the wives and just the dads meet up for drinks, movies or whatever. I'm excited about this group, that has about 70 total members, and it gives me the chance to get out of the house and Evan around other kids...helping both of us socialize. It looks pretty cool...every Wednesday they meet over at a group member's house during the late morning to afternoon. Then every Friday they have, what they call "Adventure Fridays", which is an outing of some kind...whether to just the park or museum, or to a civil war battlefield or the zoo, or whatever. I contacted KCDADs organizer, Mick, last week and he invited me out to Fun Run last Friday.

I dunno why or when it started, but when I'm thrown out of my comfort zone and meeting new people, I get nervous and a bit anxious. I never used to be socially retarded, but over the past few years, I developed this weird uncomfortableness or awkwardness around new people. I hate it...but figured I'd overcome my insecurities and try this group out.

Evan & I show up and quickly meet up with Mick. There's about six or so other dads there with their little ones...ranging in ages from 3 months to about 4 or 5 years old. Everyone seemed to be really nice and welcoming. Mick gave me the overview about the group...and another fellow dad, Shannon, invited me out for the upcoming Dads Night Out next week. I'm still rolling around in my head if I should go or not.

Another fellow dad (I've forgotten his name) warned me that his son, who is about 2 or 3 years old, is the most difficult one of the entire group. He explained that his son has always been difficult since he was a baby...but he seemed to be doing okay that day. Evan seemed to love the interaction with the other kids and Fun Run. They had an area designated for 3 and under with large colorful toys and other cool stuff. Evan was fascinated by this one large wheel thing that had balls inside. However, he encountered his first "bully" (if a child that age can really be a bully?)...the aforementioned child. He was on the other side of this large wheel, playing with the paddle that hits the balls around. He saw Evan staring in wonder at all the bright cool colors...and apparently he didn't like that. He stormed around the corner, covered Evan's eyes with his hands and yanked Evan backwards and hit him on his head. It happened so fast, and I was right there with Evan the whole time... I snatched Evan up and the other kid's dad came over and scolded him for it. He asked if he knew why he got into trouble and made his son apologize to Evan. It then happened again, Evan was still playing, and he got mad that Evan was still there, and came back around and tried to hit Evan on the head again. His dad was there and stopped him before it happened.

Right before we left, Evan was playing with some other large toy that had cylindrical spinning blocks with letters. The same kid was still playing with the large wheel nearby. He glanced over at Evan and me...and came over and got in the way of Evan playing and pushing him out of the way. That's when my papa bear instinct came out. I told him to stop, and that he could play and share, but Evan was there first and not to ever touch or hit Evan again. He stopped and went back to playing with another toy. My blood was about to boil.

I hope that this child isn't gonna be a problem for Evan. His dad knows that he has issues, and is working on correcting them. I just hope for my sanity and Evan, this kid stops what he's doing. This isn't gonna stop me from going to future playgroups...

But in all, I think this group will be a good thing for the both of us...and I look forward to what's in store!